November 24, 2004 – 8:28 pm
It’s been a rough few nights around here. Ethan has his days and nights reversed and it is so hard to be up with him all night then up all day with Amanda. We are trying to get him to get his days/nights right but it’s very hard. He’s also been very gassy and fussy. Broke down and gave him some gas drops because he is just so miserable. I haven’t been eating anything that should cause him to be so gassy. I’m vegan, so no dairy, and I haven’t had any of the “gassy” vegetables like broccoli. Maybe it’s the soymilk? Perhaps I should switch to Rice milk, which I like better anyway.
He has grown so much! He fits into his Sandy’s and Airflow covers now, so I don’t have to use those nasty disposables during the day. I do put them on at night because he pee’s/poo’s so much I can’t keep up with him. The boobs are ok now, engorgement is gone, nursing pain is gone, I just leak like crazy. Can’t wait for that to stop, I constantly smell like sour milk and spit up. Ah, life with a newborn Ethan has his 2 week check up tomorrow afternoon.
November 9, 2004 – 8:30 pm
Ethan is 5 days old now, things are starting to get hard. even though ive been nursing for 4 years, my boobs have become painfully engorged and he cant latch on. every night it takes what seems like hours to get him latched on, he screams and hits me, im crying, my 4 year old is crying, its just so hard. i cant get the nipples smaller, tried ice, pumping, manual expression, different positions, having 4 year old nurse and even she cant latch on easily. this has been going on for 2 days now. my right boob is finally getting smaller but the nipple is blistered, bleeding. so ive been having himnurse on the left boob, which is so big that i have a sandy’s diaper snapped on it during the day to catch leaks. (i have picture if you want to see its quite funny but it works). then when i finally get him latched, he poos so i end up having to change his diaper which he screams the entire time, then i have to get him re-latched. oh mamas, its so hard right now. i know it wont last long, but honestly at those low points, that sample of formula they were ‘nice” enough to send me doesnt look so bad. no id never ever do that, but i can understand now how first time moms (even experienced moms!) could go to formula after enduring another tearful painful night. i know it wont last and nursing will be ok again though, so no worries.
My 4 year old is having a difficult time adjusting. She doesn’t like Ethan very much, says that he gets “all the boobs now” and whines and cries and honestly it is annoying the piss out of me. I know my hormones are wacky and it’s normal for her to go through this, but when I’m trying to get ethan latched and she’s whining about never nursing, im ready to cry myself.
On a happy note, ethan is growing, he fits into a prowrap newborn now that has a prefold or flat diaper in 3rds in it. I can also put on a Sandy’s with small prowrap but it’s still a tad big and it rubs his cord. So i can at least cloth diaper part time or until both newborn prowraps are dirty.
November 8, 2004 – 8:31 pm
I didn’t know it was possible to have boobs get this big and not explode. I really thought that because I was still nursing Amanda that engorgement wouldn’t be a problem, but I was wrong. Amanda has a hard time latching on, so you can imagiune what poor Ethan has to go through. The past few nights have been painful and frustrating. I know this will end soon, but I can imagine how this must be for a first time mom thinking this will go on forever. I know it won’t so I’m enduring the best I can.